is much more difficult than it seems.
EDIT: A picture of my license for the world to see (the only cool thing about the license is the bear that shows up in the light). By the way, everyone has my address now so I'm expecting some mail, people.
On Wednesday, I packed up the boys and the hundred pound double stroller to head to the DMV. But first, we picked up my friend Sam so she could help watch the boys while I was filling out paperwork and taking the written test. I had an appointment for 12:20, but we went early because Sam had work at 1pm. I got in line to get a number and was informed I needed my birth certificate in order to switch my license. I had my social security card and my KY license, but those were not sufficient. The only thing running through my head was, "Are you kidding me? You mean, I have to put the boys back in their carseats, figure out how to fold this dang stroller (which had taken me ten minutes just to open), drop Sam off because she had work and come back here all by myself with a 14 month old and 3 year old. You've got to be joking?!" The man wasn't joking. So back to the car we went.
After picking up my birth certificate, snacks for the boys, and dropping Sam off I was back at the DMV. I opened the stroller in record time, got the boys loaded and back inside, roughly an hour later. They still hadn't called my original number. We only had to wait about five minutes though before B108 was called. Upon arriving at window #15, the lady asked if I had gotten my car inspected. She said, "You need to take your car around to the side and have it inspected." I looked at her like she was speaking a foreign language. She couldn't possibly mean that I have to go back to my car, unload the boys, strap them into their carseats, fold the double stroller, lift the beastly thing into my trunk, maneuver it until it actually fits, get in my car and drive around the side of the building for a ten minute inspection just to repark my car, unload the stroller and the boys and come back inside to complete the paperwork. Oh, that's precisely what she meant. I was about to just leave.
Luckily, I need my dad's signature to complete the car registration so she said I could come back at a later date to finish the registration and get my car inspected then. I was so relieved. After finishing the paperwork to switch my license, I had to go to Camera 1 for the dreaded photo. I was prepared though. I did my makeup that morning, although my face was flushed from getting the boys in and out of the car a million times, my hair was straightened. I hadn't worn sunglasses all day to be sure I wouldn't have the marks on my nose. This picture was going to turn out perfect. The lady told me to stand on the line, look at the blue dot and wait for the flash. She failed to mention how long this would take. So I'm smiling, staring at the blue dot, even though the camera is clearly above the dot. My smile starts fading into the "hurry up and take the dang picture" smile, and as I glance over to check on the boys, it flashes. She's obviously going to have me retake the picture because there is no way that's going to be the picture everyone sees when they ask to see my cool, new CA license. She hands me some papers and tells me to go to the blue door to take my test. That was it. No, "Oh let's retake that and get a better picture". Nothing. As I look over the papers, I see the picture. My hair is flat to my head. My right ear is sticking out. My face looks fat. My smile looks fake. And to top it all off, I have a lazy, awkward looking eye. Great. Just great.
The boys have been perfect this entire time though. Not making a sound. They ate some Goldfish, drank water and have been doing awesome. We get to the blue door, go inside and wait for the lady to give me the test. Of course, Pierce starts kicking his feet against the stroller. Need I remind you, the room is completely silent. I tell Pierce to stop and to stay quiet. He surprisingly complies. I get my test and go to the corner of the room to take it and park the stroller directly behind me. There's only 36 questions. Surely the boys can stay quiet for another 5 minutes while I take this Driver's test. Apparently, that was asking for too much. Pierce starts saying, "Randi, Hey Randi. Randiii. Hey." I turned around to ask him what he needed. He was finished with his Goldfish. I took the container from him and told him to be quiet for five more minutes and we would be leaving. I continue taking my test when I feel someone poking my butt. I hear Pierce giggling while saying, "Belly buttoonnn, belly buttoonnn." I tried not to laugh because that would only egg him on. I reminded him to stay quiet. So of course he turns around to start playing with Teddy. Teddy starts laughing. Loudly. I quickly answered my last few questions, so I could get out of there. I mean, the people in that room needed their peace and quiet to concentrate on this test. While I was waiting to be given my test, people were being told they failed. It was seriously one after another. So when I got in line to get mine checked, I was sure I had failed. Every single person in front of me had. It was ridiculous. She graded my test (I only missed three), punched a hole in my KY license, gave me a temporary license to use in conjunction with my KY license, and sent me on my way.
Only I didn't get very far. I was attempting to not run over anyone's toes and get out of the blue door, but the stroller was just not cooperating at all. I mean, picture little ol' me trying to maneuver this huge double stroller through a tiny hallway with people lined up on the sides. Impossible. So a lady had to literally pull the front of the stroller for me, while another was holding the door open. I finally escaped the testing room and made my way to the car. I loaded up the boys and strapped them in their carseats. Then I tried unsuccessfully to load the dang stroller into the trunk. After about five minutes of no success, a lady who is randomly jogging through the DMV parking lot (I mean, who does that?!) passes by and says, "Oh, don't worry honey, it gets easier!" I wanted to scream, "These are not my kids. I am not a 22 year old single mother with two children." But I refrained and just smiled at her. After about another five minutes of unsuccessfully getting the stroller in my trunk, I had to ask a guy walking by to assist. He lifted it out of the trunk, flipped it over and put it back in. Genius. Why didn't I think of that?
After spending the entire day at the DMV, we were all tired and hungry. So we stopped at IHOP to eat chicken, waffles and chocolate cake. And it was the best dang food I've ever eaten.
Even though it was a crazy day where nothing went as planned, I can finally say I am an official California resident, organ donor and registered voter in CA. My license is being mailed to me and I have two months to go back to complete my car registration.
After going through all this trouble, I definitely won't be moving back to Kentucky anytime soon.
